.it.never.happened.

so i didn't end up having surgery. long story short, there was something wrong with the scope (the camera they use to see what they're doing inside your body), and they didn't find out until i was on the OR table! yes. you read correctly. i was about to get drugged, when the doc came in and said 'we have a problem. there's something wrong with the scope.' i thought he was kidding at first because everyone could tell how nervous i was. but he wasn't. i took that as a sign that maybe i should get a 2nd opinion instead of rushing into this thing. good thing i did, because the orthepedic surgeon i saw said that he's not convinced that i need surgery at this point. he said i'm still at the point where it could go either way - heal on its own or i may need surgery in about 6 weeks.

i know everyone gets injured once in a while and have to hold off on doing their athletic activities; but i'm not used to getting injured and this is the first time when i actually have something athletic that i want to do..so now that i can't do it for an indefinite amount of time...this sucks. i keep saying it sucks and i think i'll continue to say that because at this point, my chances of running the marathon again are slim to none.

so....this sucks.

i know i don't have much to complain about in my life. i'm not blind, deaf, i'm in generally good health...so i have a lot to be thankful for...i think i just complain to complain. i'm trying to change my attitude, but it's defo hard. but i'm trying!

this sucks. but i'm lucky...how's that?